Officially Jobless and Confused, Fucked up With My Life

My title say it all....now only left with my MW job...hiaz....i still got lotsa unpaid bills, and my cough is getting from bad to worse...previously used to cough more at night, but now, im lyk practically coughing every single minute!

And to top it all, lovelife of mine is not well once again...what a way to start a new year....All these probs are weighing down on me, and I really felt so breathless everytime...and my life has become so abnormal...i drank alot, club alot and slp alot...but I still feel very lerthagic. I wana have my normal life back, though come to think of it, it wasn't realli that normal oso, but in the very least, more normal than now la...now its lyk, i only slp at 6am and woke up at 4pm...then i dun realli eat, cuz my whole body is lyk intoxicated with liquior, plus wif my cough, i wana puke sia...

And my love life??Haiz...Im so tired already...Somehow,we are too much like a couple, but a quiet one. We dun mixed ard with each other's frens, we dun enjoy any hobbies together, and we dun really tok lyk pals...I cun take it la....i need someone who can cheer me up wif stupid jokes, even if the joke is made on me, i need someone who laugh off at MY stupid and lame jokes and not go :"Huh? oh, ok.." I need someone who can mix well wif my pals, rnjoy the times wif them, play along with them and not alwaz put on a super stern face and i'll kept having pals coming to me asking y is my bf so angry...I need someone to share his knowledge with me maybe to tell me things frm goldfish do slp to Hilther is a gay....

I dun wan a bf to alwaz quarrel petty stuffs wif me, to be so fucking jealous coz im wif so and so, to trt me better after i flare up, to alwaz ask me to decide where to go and what to do just becoz hes the one driving....I noe encouragements are a bonus to anyone, but when its someone like me, when my probs are beyond solving, when i already noe the consequences and the limited means that i have to solve the probs, encouragements just dun work anymore, they juz made me feel more fucked up...however, if you cheer me up with stupid moves, stupid jokes or bring me to somewhere dumb, i'll feel really beta...

I'm already 24, i wan a guy to be with lyk the rest of my life if possible. I dun wana find those on short terms. And if im looking for my life partner, then i'll of coz find one who will make me happy whenever im wif him...hiaz...its just so fucking irritating...